The name of that song is "Center of Attention" by the way.

One of us won't last the night, between you and me it's no surprise

There's two of us, both can't be right

Neither will move till it's over

I'm the center of attention and the wall's inside my head

And no one will ever no it if I keep my mouth shut tight

My own little world is what I deserve

Cause I am the only child there is

I'm king of it all, the bell of the ball

I promise I've always been like this

Forever the first, my bubble can't burst

It's almost like only I exist

Where everything's fine, if I can keep my mouth shut tight...tight...tight

All by myself, I'm so much better on my own

And way out the, it is the same old place that it always has been

I'm the center of attention and the wall's inside my head

And no one will ever no it if I keep my mouth shut tight..tight...tight

My own little world is what I deserve

Cause I am the only child there is

I'm king of it all, the bell of the ball

I promise I've always been like this

Forever the first, my bubble can't burst

It's almost like only I exist

Where everything's fine, if I can keep my mouth shut tight...tight...tight

One of us won't last the night, between you and me it's no surprise

There's two of us, both can't be right

Neither will move till it's over

I'm the center of attention and the wall's inside my head

And no one will ever no it if I keep my mouth shut tight

Yeah, no one will ever notice if I keep my mouth shut tight...tight...tight

Cause I am the only child there is

I'm king of it all, the bell of the ball

I promise I've always been like this

Forever the first, my bubble can't burst

It's almost like only I exist

Where everything's mine, if I can keep my mouth shut tight...tight...tight

I love Guster, too bad their tour isn't coming anywhere near here.

I feel like I've lost something recently, creativity I think. I can't even manage to post simple messages, much less write. I used to pride myself as a fairly strong communicator, the silences keep getting longer though.

Note to self... DON'T GO TO WABASH... now having said tha,t I'm probably going to end up here. I dunno, the guys are nice an everything. But when I'm here something doesn't click right, but again as I said before, I like having girls to distract me in class.

And there is way way way way way way way too much of the machismo bulllshit floating around here. It's what guys do together, but it's pretty much non-stop.

Foods been good, but if it's not a meal time, there is NOTHING to eat, especially since the little restaurant and the bookstore are closed on Saturday. So I end up going through most of the day starving, and than gorge myself. Yesterday's dinner consisted of (and this is here to gross you out Elizabeth) Roast beef, mashed potatoes, salad, vegetarian lasagna, and I had two helpings. They also had these dry, yet tasty cookies. Today's lunch was a double hamburger, one patty soy, one patty beef. Oh, and you know the soy is too raw when it either.

1.) Moves

2.) Moos

3.) Or bites back
Cam't wait to get back home, even if it is just to go back to school, I don't like having to use things that aren't mine, unless they are Alan's or Chris', those are fair game.

Well, here I am in ye olde Wabash. To be perfectly honest I am wondering what the fuck I'm doing down here. Ripon, while not my first choice, does rank higher than Wabash as far as where I want to go. Wabash might be a better school academically, but I don't like it here... for those of you not in the know, it's all guy. Girls are allowed on campus, but only as guests, and I like having classes with girls.

I'm currently thanking god for AP English and AP American History.. whether I actually go to Wabash or not is inconsequential, I take a certain amount of pride in my abilities in those two areas and to be destroyed in those tests would be a blow to my pride. Well, the English test was basically a poetry timed write, thank you Misses Mary Bayne for teaching me so much about pulling random shit from my ass. The poem was this really strange thing written by some Wabash prof. about how humans are cruel... the grammar would have given Emily Dickinson pause.

As for History test, it was basically a bunch of questions about stuff that I learned during AP US this year... of course some of the stuff we hadn't gotten to yet but...
Things would have been a helluva lot worse if I hadn't had that class.

I'm bored out of my mind, the room I'm in is real freaking cool, and so are the guys I'm with, but I'd really much rather be back in Omaha. Well, the room is like this, it's pretty damn big, big enough for there to be a loft that you can stand up under without bashing your head. On top of the loft are the two guys' computers, one of which I'm using now. The main problem with the loft is you have to climb up this free standing ladder that leans majorly to the left. The only advice the gave me on my way up.. "Stay to the right." They have a couch, a love seat, a bar, two recliners and two TVs. So yeah, nice.

I wanna bang my head against a wall and scream and curse and shout. I wanna slam the ass holes who decided it would be funny to shoot fucking paint balls at me. I wanna rip out my hair and rant and rave and throw things that will break. I want to walk and just keep on walking. I want... I want to do something that no one is expecting....

I'm in a rut. I HATE ruts.

I sit and watch a movie and pine, eat. Sit and watch another movie, and pine some more. Finally I watch yet one final movie for the night, finish pining for the night, and go home.

I've been writing a lot lately, and I've been keeping more of the stories than is usual for me. I can't say why, but death seems to be all I write about anymore.

The stories aren't exactly funny so much as absurd. The one with the guy in the room filled with timers, another one involving death being bought out by Microsoft. Another story along the Death Inc. line where one of the employees goes on maternity leave and is written from the point of view of a temp. And finally, another Death Inc. story involving the company going on strike.

I don't know where the angst is coming from, I wish I did...

"Physician, heal thyself."

You are Nabeshin. You are constantly on the move
and have a way with the ladies. It may be
possible that you may have ties with the mob
that you haven't told your mother about...you
should probably let her know. Nice afro by the
way...


What Excel Saga Character Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

I wrote a story last night, it was actually kind of interesting, I might edit it and put it up here, but don't get your hopes up. It was about people being numbers, and the main character, (it was only about two pages long) was a man named Frank who sat in a room all day and stared at timers, the room went on forever, but he didn't have to watch all the timers, just so long as some of them were watched. At night someone came in and relieved him, but during his shift he didn't get any breaks or anything. It wasn't too bad though, he had a toilet in there (it was covered with timers) and he could bring food with him. Well, basically, all of these timers were counting down, and whenever one reached zero, that person died. It didn't really matter though, new timers were always popping up on the wall. The story, such as it is, is an interview with Frank, I really shouldn't be allowed to sit alone all day.

In hind sight, that was a lot funnier in the car.

Brief Key:
R-Radio
P-Peter (me, ya dumbass)
A-Alan
R:(Playing Squirrel Nut Zippers)If we were made of cellophane we'd all get stinking drunk much faster!
P:I've had this CD for 3 years now and that line STILL doesn't make sense.
A:Well... I think it means that if you're a flimsy person
P:But, if you were made of cellophane you'd be resistant to liquids and stuff, wouldn't that mean you got drunk slower?
A:Not necessarilly
P:Anyways, if I were made of cellophane I would only care about one thing, the sandwich I was wrapped around. All I care about is keeping that sandwich nice and fresh.
A:Yeah, but you know someone did a shitty job of wrapping you around that sandwich, and so it isn't fresh anymore.
P:And you know what really sucks? They'd blame it alllll on me. Man, I'd be like, "You know what, just because you don't care enough about your sandwich to give it the time and loving it needs, don't go blaming me if you can't wrap it right!" Man, if these sandwiches could talk...